Friday, October 22, 2010

STORM FROM X FACTOR HUMILIATES HIMSELF IN FAILED MURDER SPREE




"I want everyone to never give up. You haven't seen the last of me." - The very nearly chilling words said by 37 year old X Factor reject Storm, as he left the show last weekend. Few could have known how potentially omenous his words would prove.

Just days later, the angry, vengeful singer set out on a murderous spree, vowing revenge on Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh, who he blamed for his early demise, and the general public who had failed to back him.

Loading a holdall with shotguns, the failed celebrity set off on his vengeful quest, but didn't have any bus fare to get to Cowell's home in West London. "This isn't the last you've heard of me!", he warned the bus driver.

Walking slowly into town, Storm decided to start his kill spree, but realised he had mislaid his bag of guns somewhere back a few miles ago, during the bus kerfuffle. Grabbing a blunt knife from a local cafe, he attempted to slash a passing pensioner, but slipped on a banana skin and landed face first in some freshly laid horse shit.

"Follow your dreams, horse shit, you haven't heard the last of me!", he angrily promised the manure.

Storm then tried to storm into a primary school and do a Dunblane, but it was Saturday. "I'll be back!", he warned, before returning to a life of failure and obscurity.

No comments:

Post a Comment